The Augmented Fifth – 1/7/2018
Sunday, January 7, 2018
Seriously, calm down. I know it’s been a while but don’t worry your pretty little head, Fifth House is back! We are (mostly) rested, relaxed, and sane… mmm… maybe not that last one. And let me tell you, no one is more excited about it than me because it is way too hard to write this blog when there isn’t anything going on. But you’ll be happy to know that Fifth House being back to rehearsing means that a bunch of crazy junk is going to happen that I will be able to thoroughly report on.
And lucky you, my football team wasn’t good enough to make the playoffs this year, so I have nothing to distract me from entertaining you. You’re welcome.
Of Time and Space
Rufus M. Hitch Public School
January 11, 2018
RANDOM MUSIC WE’RE DIGGING THIS WEEK
Now that the holidays are officially over, I can finally delete those Christmas playlists off my phone and get back to the garbage I normally listen to. Unrelated to garbage, and also a seamless segue, is this little ditty by Look Park.
For those of you who remember jamming to Stacy’s Mom, might recognize the voice of former Fountains of Wayne lead singer, Chris Collingwood. Now image that you actually grew up from 2003 and listen to this.
After a few weeks off, the Fifth House Top 10 is back. That’s certainly worthy of the #1 spot.
Katherine is pawning off her students material tributes. Hit her up for toffee or erasers that are shaped like toffee… or donuts or whatever.
Grace’s daughter has fallen under the spell of soy sauce. There is just never enough.
Barb Drapcho is a f*cking rockstar. That is all.
Good guy Eric stayed far away from us while he had the flu. Follow us closely while we stave off the inventible Fifth House plague. See you this summer, old friend.
Elizandro thought Costa Rican weather would be better than Chicago. That’s where you’re wrong! My car is now more protected than ever with a protective layer of ice. Take that.
Herine went and gave a lecture all by her lonesome. Good news is that no one needs to know how many celebratory drinks you have when you are by yourself…
Aubrey, our education intern, has actually been reading these. Thanks for making me realize I should watch what I say.
Melissa has a phone that can recognize her face. And just like that, my plot to hack her phone with my own face has been thwarted.
Parker got a new water bottle and is making dehydration his bitch.
THIS WEEK IN HAIKU
Rehearsals this week
for Of Time and Space concert
Learn some science, kids
Never a better time than the new year to make a change. This year, I’ve already bettered myself by finding out some important information about the true nature of dogs eating spaghetti.
I think we’re all a little better for this video.
Welcome back to work everyone!
In honor of eating healthier, here are some incredibly delicious wings I made.
Spoiler alert: they are quite bad for you.
Can you believe we all had enough time to complete things like this puzzle over break?
Get back to work…
Thanks for showing CMA no mercy! #lecturemaster